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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I was at a restaurant with my wife when a waitress suddenly screamed, "Does anyone know CPR??"
I shouted, "Even better, I know the whole alphabet!" Everyone laughed... Well, everyone except this one guy.
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I’ve just been attacked by a herd of cows.
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I saw my nephew after a long time, and said “Wow! You must have grown a foot since I saw you last!”
He said, “No. I still have two.”
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Just so everybody's clear,
I'm going to put my glasses on.
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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