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I don't trust these trees
They seem kind of shady
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Four years ago today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. Today, I asked her to marry me.
She said no both times.
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What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quackhead.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my eyes on you.
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I gave all my dead batteries away today…
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