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Before my operation, my doctor gave me the option to be knocked out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation.
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My can opener broke ...
Now it’s a can’t opener.
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Dad: when I was your age I ran a maratho. Son: you mean marathon.
Dad: no I didn’t finish it.
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How do you steal a coat?
You jacket.
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Cosmetic surgery used to be something that people would be embarrassed to speak about
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