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I don’t mean to toot my own horn
But sometimes I have trouble getting into the driver’s seat.
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My neighbor blamed my gravel for making him fall…
But it was his dumb asphalt…
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After all these years, my wife still thinks I’m sexy.
Every time I walk by she says, “What an Ass.”
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I've done some terrible things for money..
Like getting up early for work.
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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