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How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?
That was supposed to be in place a week ago.
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Guy at the door: Sir, would you like to make a donation to the local orphanage?
Dad: No problem. (To me) Hey, you live with this guy from now on.
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I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
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An apple, a banana, and an orange were on the high dive. Only the banana wouldn't jump. Why?
Because it was yellow.
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Do windmills like punk rock?
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