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Working out is like a drug to me.
I don’t do drugs.
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What do you call a bad interior decorator?
An inferior decorator
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"Sergeant! Sergeant! The troops are revolting!"
"Well, you're no prize pig yourself."
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I asked my wife to describe me in 5 words. She said I'm mature, I'm moral, I'm pure, I'm polite and I'm perfect! Then she added that I also...
...had a fundamental lack of understanding about apostrophes and spaces...
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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