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Wife: What are you doing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.
Husband: I was looking for the expiration date.
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When my grandfather was ill, we rubbed lard on his back.
He went downhill quite quickly after that.
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I robbed a kitchen utensil store
I like to take whisks.
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Remember, as a child, when air for your bike was free? Now it's $1.50! I asked the gas station attendant why.
He said "inflation".
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I don't trust these trees
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