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Why was the pancake arrested?
Because he was behaving un-waffle-ly
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What's the best kind of booze if you want to dance all night long?
Wild Twerky
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Why do German girls all have the same phone number?
Every one of them I ask says 999-9999
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Send me words of encouragement so I don't murder my boss.
There is no Netflix in prison.
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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