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Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?
So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian.
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My girlfriend yelled at me today saying, “You weren’t even listening just now, were you?!”
I thought, “Man, what a weird way to start a conversation”
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Did you hear about the twins who got an apartment together?
Before they were roommates they were wombmates.
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What does Jeff Bezos do every night before bed?
He puts his pajamazon
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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