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Why do police get to riots early?
To beat the crowd
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A person asked me, "Aren't you the guy who brags about weird stuff?"
I replied, "No, Im the guy who takes the longest baths in the city".
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How does a cup hang a picture?
UP AGAINST THE WALL!!
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Child: Dad, why do you write so slow?
Dad: I'm a slow reader.
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Can I watch the TV?
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