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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Where would you find a tortoise with no legs?
Wherever you left it.
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My wife made me a millionaire
Granted I was a billionaire before I met her.
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Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Kid: No, he did it all by himself!
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When my wife found me playing with my son’s train set, I was so embarrassed that I threw a bedsheet over it.
I think I managed to cover my tracks.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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