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When I was young, my dad used to tear up the last page of all my comic books and never told me why.
I had to draw my own conclusions.
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Before my father died he worked in a circus as a stilt walker.
I used to look up to him.
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What do you say to a woman who has given birth to members of the military?
Thank you for your cervix.
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I was robbed by 6 dwarfs today.
Not happy.
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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