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What's the toughest part of being Vegan?
Keeping it to yourself.
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Although my friend has a lot of hair, he’s paranoid about going bald.
I told him, “It’s all in your head.”
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I made some fish tacos last night
But they just ignored them and swam away.
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The person who invented autocorrect
should burn in hello.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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