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Every morning after I get up, the first thing I do is make my bed.
Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of shit to IKEA.
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Wanna hear a vegetable joke?
Never mind, i don’t think your mom will lettuce hear it
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How do knights communicate?
They use chain mail.
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How quiet should a bowling alley be?
You should be able to hear a pin drop.
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Why did the bullet end up losing his job?
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