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What's the quickest way to double your money?
Fold it in half.
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A lumberjack walks into an enchanted forest. As he goes to chop down a tree, it calls out. "Wait, don't chop me down. I'm a talking tree!"
The lumberjack smiles. "And you will dialogue."
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It was mealtime on a small airline, and the flight attendant asked a passenger if he would like dinner. "What are my choices?" he asked.
"Yes or no."
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Why did the blind lady fall into the well?
Because she couldn't see that well.
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I think my favorite part of going to the gym
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