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What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
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I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday
Not only is it terrible, it's terrible!
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The weirdest summer job I have ever had was cleaning the monkey cages at our local zoo.
That shit was bananas.
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What do you call an average potato who tells you the play-by-play action in sports?
Commentator.
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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