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What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race?
Ketchup
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my wife asked me why i type everything in lower case.
i said i stopped giving a shift.
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My friend's bakery burned down last night.
His business is toast.
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Dad: Sorry, but I only know how to make two dishes: meat loaf and apple pie.
Kid: Which one is this?
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I don't trust these trees
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