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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my eyes on you.
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A sheep dog says to the farmer, "I'm going to round up the sheep." The dog comes back with 50 sheep. The farmers says, "we only have 48 sheep."
The dog replies, "Yea, I told you I was going to round them up."
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What do you call a dinosaur from Canada?
A Torontosaurus Rex!
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I cooked a medium rare steak for my friend and he said, “I like it well done.”
I said, “Thanks. That means a lot.”
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What do you get when you cross the Atlantic on the Titanic?
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