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This morning at breakfast, my dad looked at us very seriously and said, “It hurts me when I say this..”
..”But I have a sore throat.”
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Why couldn’t the sailors play cards?
The captain was standing on the deck.
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The waitress came over and saw my leftovers and asked, "do ya wanna box for that?"
I responded with, "no, but we can arm wrestle any day."
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My wife is threatening to leave me because I’m addicted to wearing a new T-shirt every half an hour.
I said, “Wait! I can change!”
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What do you call a nose with no body?
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