The strangest part about picking out a name for your child is
realizing how many people you hate.
My wife said to me, 'If you won the lottery, would you still love me?'
I said, 'Of course I would. I'd miss you, but I'd still love you.'
When I got to work this morning, my boss stormed up to me and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"
I said, "No, not particularly."