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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My wife yelled, “Hey, the sun’s coming out!” So I wore my shorts and flip flops and came downstairs.
Found my son holding hand with his boyfriend.
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What do you call a group of musical whales?
An orca-stra
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Whenever I go to a Apple Store, I feel like a three year old at a candy shop.
I can’t afford anything.
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My wife saw an ant picking up a leaf 5 times its body weight, and told me, “Can you imagine being that strong?”
So I picked up the leaf and said, “Yes.”
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People told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic
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