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My wife and I lost 100 lbs combined!
She lost 120 lbs. I gained 20.
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What is hairy, brown, and goes up and down?
A kiwi in an elevator.
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What do thieves make their weapons from?
Steal.
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What do you call a girl that breaks up with you via Instagram?
A DMX
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What’s it called when you kill chickpeas?
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