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My jackass husband just hit me with this one. Pretend you are on a boat surrounded by sharks. How do you survive?
You stop pretending.
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Why did the yogurt go to the art exhibit?
Because it was cultured.
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If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it…
…then my illegal logging business is a success
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Me: Hey dad, what’s up?
Dad: My weight
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I don't trust these trees
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