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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I found out I'm lactoes intolerant.
I can't stand, not having any toes.
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I used to get heartburn whenever I ate birthday cake...
... until the doctor told me to take the candles off first!
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Patient: Doc, I don't believe that peanuts are fattening.
Doctor: Well, have you ever seen a skinny elephant?
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Knock-knock! Who's there? Yoda. Yoda who?
Yoda one who's supposed to do the dishes.
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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