My daughter thinks I don't give her enough privacy.
At least that's what she said in her diary.
My wife caught me cross dressing and told me it was over.
So I packed all her clothes and left.
So I texted my crush and asked her, “Are you an ancient artifact,”
“Because I want to date you.”
If you have 10 apples in one hand and 14 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Really, really big hands.