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Kid: Dad, can you teach me how to play chess?
Dad: Sure, let me pick up a board at the pawn shop.
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A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender asks, "Hey, what's with the paper towel?"
The pirate says, "Argh, I've got a Bounty on me head!"
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Someone: I like your name!
Me: Thanks, I got it for my birthday
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Why did the police go to the baseball game?
They heard someone stole second base.
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What do you get when you cross the Atlantic on the Titanic?
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