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Just so everybody's clear,
I'm going to put my glasses on.
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When I was at the pool yesterday, I began peeing in the deep end
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I almost fell in
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Why can't dogs play video games?
When they do, its always on paws.
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What's the difference between sanitizer and moisturizer?
One will burn your eyes, the other will moisturize.
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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