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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
Asking for a friend.
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Converting the number 51, 6 and 500 to Roman numerals doesn’t just make me mad....
It makes me LIVID.
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The guy at the tuxedo store keeps hovering around me, so I asked him to leave me alone.
He said, “Fine. Suit yourself.”
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I told my son people keep accidentally pleading for me to purchase meat for them. He asked, “By mistake?”
I shouted, “Oh come on! Not you too!”
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I said to my wife, "They say that childbirth is the most painful thing someone can experience..."
"Now, maybe I was too young to remember, but I didn't think it hurt that much."
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1
A furniture store keeps calling me...
All I wanted was one night stand.
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Somebody should market a beer called “Occasionally”.
So when asked, I can say, “I only drink occasionally”.
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Joke of the Day
I was fired from the keyboard factory yesterday.
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