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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I've started a boating business from my attic.
The sails are going through the roof.
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1
My wife asked for a divorce today, saying I was too un-American.
I saw it coming from a kilometer away.
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1
My therapist told me to write letters to people I hated and then burn them.
I've done that, but what do I do with the letter.
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1
Do you know what the opposite of ladyfingers is?
Mentos.
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Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?
So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian.
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I told my daughter, "Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field." She said, "What's that got to do with anything?"
I said "That means it's pasture bedtime."
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What does a CIA agent do when it's time for bed?
He goes under cover
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My dog is really good at playing fetch
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