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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Why do police get to riots early?
To beat the crowd
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?
He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"
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If organ trafficking is illegal,
then what about pianos?
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What do you call a snake that's exactly 3.14 feet long?
A πthon
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My dog is really good at playing fetch
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