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Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
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Matt Damon is severely depressed because he keeps getting typecast as an action hero.
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Remember, as a child, when air for your bike was free? Now it's $1.50! I asked the gas station attendant why.
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On the anniversary of his birth, devotees of a certain yogi asked what gifts they might bring.
The yogi replied, 'I wish for no gifts, only presence."
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Why did the stadium get so hot after the game?
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