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Why did the scientist go to the tanning salon?
Because he was a paleontologist.
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What do you tell Simba when he's moving too slow?
Mufasa!
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How did the hipster drown?
He went ice skating before it was cool.
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Electrons have mass?!
I didn’t even know they were catholic!
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Wife: What are you doing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.
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