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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
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My interviewer asked if I could preform under pressure.
I said no, but I can do a good Bohemian Rhapsody
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I was taught to never use the Oxford comma
by Mrs. Henderson, my high school English teacher and a first-rate whore.
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Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?
Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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