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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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What do you say to a woman who has given birth to members of the military?
Thank you for your cervix.
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If Jesus was the Lamb of God and Mary gave birth to Jesus..
..Then Mary had a little Lamb.
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My wife said, “You really have no sense of direction, do you?”
I said, “Where did that come from?”
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My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge
But I just can’t quit cold turkey
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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