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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Siri kept calling me Shirley this morning. I was starting to get really pissed off, and then I realized why...
I left my phone in Airplane mode
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I asked my wife to describe me in 5 words. She said I'm mature, I'm moral, I'm pure, I'm polite and I'm perfect! Then she added that I also...
...had a fundamental lack of understanding about apostrophes and spaces...
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What do you call a dog without legs?
It doesn’t matter. It won’t come if you call it.
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Light travels faster than sound.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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