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Our maintenance guy lost his legs on the job,
now he’s just a handyman.
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Living on earth is expensive
But at least you get a free trip around the sun each year
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What’s worse than having ants in your pants?
Uncles
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Matt Damon is severely depressed because he keeps getting typecast as an action hero.
He wishes he was never Bourne.
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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