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My son was just born and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday… said maybe they'll marry eachother.
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What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
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Patient: Doc, I don't believe that peanuts are fattening.
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What’s a cats favourite button on the tv remote?
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?

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