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My son asked me for something hard to write on
I don't know why he got so mad, sand is pretty hard to write on
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What did the bee say to his wife when they were running late for dinner?
Hurry up honey!
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What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quackhead.
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Did you know that spiders make excellent baseball players?
They know how to catch flies!
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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