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My friend told me he was Jewish.
I was like, “No way!” And he was like, “Yahweh.”
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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too High
She looked surprised.
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I asked my wife to describe me in 5 words. She said I'm mature, I'm moral, I'm pure, I'm polite and I'm perfect! Then she added that I also...
...had a fundamental lack of understanding about apostrophes and spaces...
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Me: Hey dad, what’s up?
Dad: My weight
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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