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My girlfriend likes to take the stairs but I prefer taking the elevator
I guess we were raised defferently.
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A guy on the street asked me how I kept my hair so nice...
Apparently he was gel-less.
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Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you.
But smoking bacon will cure it.
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My son tied his first tie today.
I looked at him and told him "Knot bad son."
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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