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My daughter is smarter than Abraham Lincoln. She can recite the Gettysburg Address, and she's only nine years old.
Lincoln didn't say it until he was 50!
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I think my wife is leaving me because of my obsession with simplifying fractions.
Oh well, hind sight is 1.
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Last night I dreamed I wrote Lord of the Rings.
Guess I was Tolkien in my sleep.
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What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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