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Me: Honey, I'm terrified of vowels. Wife: Ummm, why?
Me: Only sometimes.
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My wife divorced me because I'm a compulsive gambler...
All I can think about is how to win her back!
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What do you get when you cross the Atlantic on the Titanic?
About half way...
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When does a doctor become frustrated?
When they run out of patients
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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