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I’ve just won a few hands in poker.
Some people really will gamble anything.
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I wish I could be ugly for one day
Being ugly every day sucks
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What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race?
Ketchup
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Two jumper cables walk into a bar
The bartender goes, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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