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I was on a date with a woman who said "I am a big country fan."
Me trying to sound intelligent: " Well, China is 3.7 million square miles. "
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Someone asked if there is a local chess club?
Let me check mate
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There was a robbery at the Apple store.
The police are rounding up iWitnesses.
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I won an award for being the best scarecrow in my field.
I told them, "Hay, it's in my jeans."
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When I was young, my dad used to tear up the last page of all my comic books and never told me why.
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