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I had to give up on my idea to create a miniature flamethrower
It was burning a hole in my pocket
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Doctor: I'm sorry sir, but you have colon cancer...
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It’s probably not safe for me to be driving this car right now.
But hey, bad brakes have never stopped me before.
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I made a pencil with two erasers
It was pointless.
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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