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Every morning I plan on making pancakes,
but I keep waffling.
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When my wife was still pregnant I used to say
that our baby was in his one womb apartment.
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I lost five pounds last week,
but I found them in a fridge over the weekend.
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My girlfriend likes to take the stairs but I prefer taking the elevator
I guess we were raised defferently.
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I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.
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