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Do you feel cold?
Go to the corner, there’s 90 degrees.
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Why does it take a pirate so long to learn the alphabet?
Because he spends years at C!
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A photon checks into a hotel, and the bellhop says, "Can I get your bags for you?"
"No need, good sir," replies the photon. "I'm traveling light."
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I used to eat watches and clocks for every meal, but I had to stop.
It was too time consuming.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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