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If you have 10 apples in one hand and 14 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Really, really big hands.
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Interviewer: We only hire people who are responsible.
Well, your search ends today. At my previous job, whenever something went wrong, everybody said I was responsible.
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Why are cats bad storytellers?
Because they only have one tale.
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The clouds parted and a voice thundered, "Come forth, and you'll receive eternal life."
But John came fifth, so he just got a toaster.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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