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If an athlete gets athlete's foot
then an astronaut must get missile toe.
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What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
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I’ve been caught money laundering.
My brother found $20 in my shorts taking them out of the dryer
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A drunk wakes up in jail, "Why am I here officer?". "For drinking." replies the cop.
"Great" says the man. "When do we start?"
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What bug did dinosaurs hate the most?
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