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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I recently bought 51% of a Vampire hunting company...
I'm the main stake holder.
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My wife said to me, 'If you won the lottery, would you still love me?'
I said, 'Of course I would. I'd miss you, but I'd still love you.'
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What did Beethoven become after he died?
A decomposer.
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I find that computer programming is a great painkiller.
It involves a lot of codeine.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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